This was the question from a dear friend as I tried to communicate all the emotions running through me as I contemplate my upcoming move to Abu Dhabi. The two mint mojitos were helping me sort out those feelings and here is what I came up with:
I am afraid that in this new place in a new culture that I don't know or understand, I will have to be so careful with how I behave that I will dumb down, supress myself to the point that I will lose myself. Dumbing down, supressing my true self was something that I defaulted to over time in my marriage and when I woke up after several years I found I was no longer my true self. That was the hardest time in my life. Let's just say that I barely survived it. It took a lot of work to get myself back. I'm feeling strong and grounded in my life here. And scared I will loose that ground going into this unfamiliar territory. Not just having to start all over again professionally and personally. But with the added complication doing it in a foreign culture where it is easy to offend and hard to impress. Scary stuff.
So that is the biggest fear thing that's simmering in my brain. Along with all the other stuff. Still can't believe it. Back to the boxes. And the wine. and the pudding. God bless Cozy Shack. Wish me luck.
19 hours ago