Monday, August 10, 2009

My Head Runneth Over

I have been a little at a loss for blogging inspiration. Or so I thought. But I think what is really going on is a lot in my head and having trouble sorting through it enough to put it out there. I truly have lots going on in there. Inside my head that is. Just to let you know some of those random thoughts that I might/should expand on, what those little voices are saying to me:

"You are a selfish soul. Why would you think anybody would be interested in the thoughts that go through your head? Blogging is just an outlet for self centered women who live under the fantasy that their thoughts mean anything to anybody but themselves. Get over yourself."

"I want it to be me in that bed. Not my sister. I have far less to be doing and nobody is dependent on me."

"I'm glad it's not me in that bed. Now what can I do to make me feel useful."

"So your son is back in school. Now what's your motivation?"

"Wasband will be announcing his engagement any day. Hold on sistah."

"What is wrong with you? You are running out of excuses on why you aren't jumping on e-harmony or otherwise entering the dating game. What is your problem?"

"Make something of your life. Good grief."

"What are you going to do when there's no more work to support you?"

"What happened to your waistline? You have certainly let yourself go."

"This iPhone is awesome. You can waste lots of time playing around on it and ignoring what's going on around you. Way to go."

"You are so fortunate. Your life is perfect for you."

"You do not deserve the blessings you have received."

"I am abundantly blessed. Thank you Jesus."

"What am I going to wear?"

"Garden produce is such a blessing. Bruschetta on crostini every night until the harvest runs out."

"How many pairs of shoes are you going to hold onto? You only wear 1/4 of what's in your closet. In fact you are in danger of turning into a hoarder with 15 cats and a home that you can only find pathways through the piles of stuff. The place will begin to smell. Nobody will want to come over. Something in front of a heater will catch on fire. Gorgeous firemen will come to your home and be so disgusted. The insurance won't cover because it was your fault. You will have nothing. Nothing. You will have to move in with your father who is a worse hoarder than you."

"I love my friends. I am only as alone as I want to be."

"What if it were me in that bed instead of my sister? There's no way I could be as resilient as she. If I broke my leg I would have to live in a nursing home. You have no bathroom on the main level. I would soon become a babbling old person who couldn't do anything for myself. Friends would have to come in and get things for me from my home and would see what a chaotic hoarder I am in danger of becoming. I would have to sell my home in this down market, losing money, losing my good credit, losing this house which was given to me. Lose my job. Lose the ability to drive that car I love."

"I have ice-cream drumsticks in the freezer. Do not think about those ice-cream drumsticks in the freezer. Sheesh. Just go ahead and eat them. As soon as you are done you won't have to think about them and then you won't be in danger of eating them. Note to self: do NOT buy any more ice-cream drumsticks for your freezer."

"I need to blog. My readers will give up on me. Though why they would care about the voices in my head I have no idea. Nothing of importance in there. Get over yourself."

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