Thursday, January 15, 2009

All Is Well

So some of you have expressed concern that entries in my blog are referencing plans for what to do if I die or what I would miss if I die. For many people this is a hard topic. For me it used to be, but not so much any more. I don’t want it to sound flippant as I raise conversation around this topic. Death is a sad, awful thing. For those that are left behind. For me that’s the downside: I want to be here to help my son find his way through life. To catch him when he falls. To give him those annoying pep talks he pretends he doesn’t want to hear. I want to be around to see my nieces and nephews grow into the fantastic people they are showing signs of becoming. I want to be a soft place for my friends to fall that are going through hard times. And I want to be a voice of helpful insight and guidance for those younger ones who are trying to get a handle on what we do for a living: how to make things happen for our clients. I want to not only be in on, but be a source for crazy laughter as we laugh at ourselves trying to figure out this thing called life.

But the upside is that I am not afraid of dying. This life here on earth is hard. Some of you are experiencing that a thousand fold more times than I will ever know. It’s also incredibly entertaining, if you are looking for that. God’s planted some really fascinating coincidences, treasures, surprises and blessings. But you have to have your eyes open to see them. Even so, it’s all just fleeting and temporary. I’m excited to see what lies on the other side of the curtain, and I do apologize if it makes any of you feel uncomfortable hearing that. I can’t wait to see my mum again. And to meet Hunter Simpson and Mother Theresa. I look forward to a time when deadlines don’t hang over, accomplishment doesn’t take a front seat, stressors don’t have a place to settle, and bodies don’t break down. I want to know all God’s secrets. And, as eternity knows no clocks or calendars, I won’t have to be impatient as I wait to meet up with the good souls who are my family and friends who will eventually catch up to me on the other side.

Now I don’t plan to be foolish and put myself at risk to get to that other side any quicker than a more natural course would take. I think that sentence means that I will be prudent and careful in living my life. No drunk driving. No reckless use of painkillers. But I also intend to live with adventure and open eyes. That includes putting myself into a remote African village to deliver love and hope to long suffering people. (that’s what I think I am doing, but who knows: they may be the ones delivering that to me). And when I am preparing to do that I start to think about what I want my friends and family to know and that is this: I am not afraid to die so don’t be afraid for me. All is well with my soul.
(Picture: Sicily, 2007)

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